You love your partner. You know that.
That’s not the question.
It’s more: are you really, really happy?
And are they happy with you?
If you continue as you are now, things might be okay.
But that’s just not feeling right.
The thing is, you don’t know how to do differently. You don’t know how to make the changes that you can see need to happen. And you’re not even sure if they’re possible.
...Sometimes you wonder
Should we split up?
But that’s not sitting well either.
There are implications to such a decision...
So you feel stuck, unsure of your next step, afraid that it won’t lead you out of this incessant holding pattern that is slowly leaking oxygen and hope.
The thing that you know for sure is that you can’t keep living like this forever.
Actually, I agree with you.
You definitely need to GET OUT of this holding pattern.
Because “almost” is not full fuck-yes living.
And if you’re the person who has heard (from others, or from your own critic) that you should be content with “good,” I’m here to help you call bullshit on that.
This is your one life.
Accept nothing less than spectacularly amazing.
You are meant to accidentally snort your morning coffee because your partner just made you laugh - again - and because the space between you is clear and positive.
You are meant to feel so safe that you can be real about your secret desires, knowing that those desires will be not only accepted, but celebrated.
You are designed to live in deep relationship.
You are meant to be cherished, delighted in, appreciated; like your partner smiling at you and putting their arms around you is the best medicine on the planet.
This is what I help couples do.
Here’s a surprising twist. One thing that my years as a couple’s therapist confirmed again and again: trauma changes things. Your trauma, and your partner's trauma.
It clouds your vision, and darkens the space between, making your partner the fulfillment of your deepest fears, rather than your highest joys. It can usurp the hopefulness of your early days - slowly, creepily - leaving you to wonder, "what happened?"
Trauma, baby. Trauma.
The Eidolon Intensive
See what’s real. Choose what’s next.
Who is your partner, and who is merely the projection of your trauma? Who are you, when you have emotional freedom?
How does the space between you change when inter-generational patterns have been shifted for good?
The Eidolon Intensive is for couples who are done with "okay," and are devoted to a fantastically great life. The kind you want to wake up to each morning, that you don't need a vacation from.
We're talking about real connection, intimacy that is hot inside and outside of the bedroom, and the security that comes from being in close relationship with who you are today, at this very hour, and who you partner truly is.
In this intensive process, we go to the neglected spaces, we have the conversations that you have tried to have, or gave up trying to have.
We excavate the trauma that has been running things from the shadows, and we activate the solutions that bring lasting and real change.
Expected outcomes
You will uncover the truths that are at play in your relationship, and at the end of this process, you will either:
- understand what you need to do in order to continue in relationship, and have a clear roadmap for living the most spectacular life together
or
- decide to break up
No more being locked in a holding pattern.
No more walking on eggshells or holding your breath.
Clarity. Direction. Relief. Understanding. Wisdom.
You don't have 6 years.
We do this in six hour days.
Get in, get out.
Get on with your life.
Here's another thing I learned as a couple's counsellor using advance trauma techniques:
it doesn't have to take forever.
And that's great news.
Real transformation does not need months and years.
But it does require depth. It does require a willingness to be brave and determined.
You don't need to do this alone, without expertise and without guidance.
As a therapist who has studied human relationships and the subconscious for over twenty years, I carry the know-how to help you move swiftly and adeptly to the areas in your life that will make all the difference. And once we're there, change is inevitable.
In a matter of days, you will either have the courage and the clarity to break up, or the inner presence and wisdom to shift things so that you can pursue a spectacularly amazing life together. Either way, your relationship will not be the same.
How to apply
The Eidolon Intensive is not for everyone.
It's not for those who believe that their life is "too busy" for them to do the very work that will determine the quality of their days and years.
It's not for those who think that a great relationship is simply the result of "luck" in "finding the right one," devoid of any conscious ongoing effort.
It's definitely not for those who are unwilling to take any ownership for how their own emotional templates and behavior patterns contribute to the quality of a relationship.
There are criteria for entering this program. Please have both members of the couple review the following descriptions, to confirm if they see these aspects in themselves:
IF
- you are finished minimizing the damage that the neglect of your relationship is having on your vitality
- you are ready to look deeply inside your own inner world, and take ownership for what you are responsible for (not more, and not less)
- you are ready to commit yourself to figuring this out, but you are done going as you have been, trying what you've already tried
- you understand the value of expert guidance and coaching to achieve the results you don't yet have
- you are ready to back all of this up by prioritizing six-hour sessions in your calendar
THEN
here are the next steps:
1) text 226-895-7066 or email consult@alisadonaldson.com
to book a virtual consultation, free of charge. Typically these occur on a Monday, and are subject to availability.
2) after the initial consultation, you may be invited to participate in Phase 1 of The Eidolon Intensive. This involves two back-to-back assessment days (of 6 hours each). The intention of Phase 1 is to assess the current status of your relationship dynamics, and subconscious or trauma-based factors at play. By the end of the assessment, you will have a strong understanding of not only what is getting in the way of your spectacularly amazing relationship, but you will have a roadmap for how to shift those factors for good. This is where we craft the design for Phase 2.
3) after the clarity and understanding that comes in Phase 1, you may be invited to participate in Phase 2, which would involve both 3-hour sessions and 6-hour sessions, some attended individually and some attended as a couple. Phase 2 of The Eidolon Intensive is a bespoke process, and the sessions are scheduled to adapt to the emergent needs of your relationship and inner worlds. Phase 2 is where we shift trauma patterns, with deep psychological exploration and experience that changes how you relate as a couple and how you relate to yourself as an individual.
Your spectacularly amazing life
is waiting for you.